Mandy Gibbons Podcast with Mike Dyson
Mandy Gibbons Podcast Show... GUEST: Mike Dyson of Good Blokes Co
Mike is the Founder of Good Blokes Co. Since 2015, Mike Dyson has lead tens of thousands of conversations with boys and men all over Australia on manhood, mental health, mateship, risk, violence and respect for women.
These conversations give him a rare insight into what’s truly going on behind the mask of masculinity and a unique perspective on how our culture of masculinity shapes our men and boy’s wellbeing and behaviour.
Mike is the lead facilitator on Good Blokes Co camps and retreats. In the education sphere, he trains teachers to design and facilitate their own programs to engage boys in meaningful reflection and conversation. His corporate presentations inspire leaders to carry the conversation on healthy masculinity forward in the workplace.
JUST SOME OF THE GOLD IN THIS EPISODE:
Mike talks about the Mother / Son camps and the Father / Son camps and how it transforms the connection and communication between sons and their parents.
Sons get to see their parents through different lenses...
Their Mum is someone who can have fun
What is their Mum really hoping for
What's their Dad's ambitions
Mum and Dad's struggles
Mike shares how his best mate's wife phoned him saying his best mate had checked himself into hospital and that he was worried about suicide. We talk about the insights it bought Mike around supporting his mate.
How Mike not too long after, found himself in the hospital emergency thinking he was having a heart attack, discovering he was experiencing anxiety. Which led Mike to men's groups, rights of passage work... and the potential of helping young men and kids with the skills to take care of their mates.
How parents, teachers and communities are embracing these conversations and helping kids to connect with adults. How Mike provides, and teaches how to provide, a safe place for these conversations to take place.
We discuss the transformational impact of this on bullying.
How Mike gets to help young men thrive during their teenage years... and into adult hood, through to dating and treating women with respect, and respecting themselves.
Mike shares, in his men's work, how so many other blokes are experiencing similar challenges when it comes to emotional awareness.
We discuss how men, as leaders, can feel the pressure of not only dealing with their own emotions and challenges, but also having others around them coming to them with their adversities... and the overwhelm that brings.
The impact of being able to accept your emotions and simply talking / saying that you're feeling sad (whatever you're feeling)...
...Mike gives an example of when his dog passed away... Being honest and open about it and if it means taking a day off or a week off, to simply ask for it. Versus feeling like you have to push through and pretend it's not happening.
We discuss changing the culture... From men feeling ashamed to say they're struggling - with fear of being black listed or managed out - from having a mental health issue... To having our mates back. To support men when they're struggling. That it doesn't have to mean ending their career.
How it gets to crisis point by not noticing or not getting on top of the stress... And the simple choices that can be implemented to help with that... versus turning to vices.
How the average Aussie Man feels like he needs to be tough, strong, unemotional... Mike shares a study of 67% of Australian men feel the pressure to meet that stereo type.
How those of us, who have the skills around emotional awareness, we can support blokes who find it hard to have those conversations. And have our mates back.
We discuss anger and frustration...Alcohol, vices, making "not so healthy decisions" when you're struggling.
How simply just having a conversation can transform a situation, when a man is going through adversity.
Mike shares how "shame" can often be a man's kryptonite and how it can prevent a man from asking for help. Mike also discusses James Gilligan research which states that the main cause of violence in young men is shame. Eg... I don't feel man enough.
How men are socially isolated. How traumatic feeling alone can be. Mike shares how feeling alone can be as dangerous to your heart (physiologically) as smoking 15 cigarettes per day.
Why it's important to have strong male supportive friendships outside of your relationship, so you're not putting the pressure on your partner.
The impact of connecting regularly whether that be via sms, messenger, quick voice messages, calls, zoom etc if we're not able to connect with mates in person.
Mike talks about the tools he uses to build emotional awareness.
We discuss resilience, taking responsibility, being accountable with our word, self care, self acceptance, embracing challenges and building momentum to empower ourselves and thriving in life.
You can connect with Mike here...
Mandy "Resilience Mastery" Gibbons
Resilience And Emotional Resilience Coach For Men